Thought i would post a few new pics of kenna and i. The ones of her at the park were taken today and i made the dress shes wearing. the ones with me are on my birthday the other day :-)
Hope everyone is having a great week!
Brightest Blessings!
*huggss
Ever think your having one of those bad dreams where you just cant seem to wake up? well let me tell ya a little story.
last july i started talking to this guy. it was nothing more than uh mutual friendship for the longest time. Then suddenly this guy starts telling me he loves me in sept sometime. I thought maybe i was hearing him wrong but i didnt ask either. a month goes by and hes still saying it. now mind you...im kinda crazy about him. so i say it back. then it was talking all the time to each other. he would talk to my lil girl on the phone. we started making random plans to meet. he lives quite a few states away mind you. the first set of ’plans’ fell thro as did a couple more after that. by now i guess you could say i let myself have a ’connection’ with this guy. so much so that if things were wrong with him i knew it cuz i would start having panick attacks out of the blue. i would call. he would tell me what was wrong we would talk it out and everything was fine. 2 weeks ago we moved. i called him crying over the things i was put thro that day. btw...we had made plans to meet when i took vacation in april. i was going to go there with my little girl for a few days to see how things went. anyways....i wasnt sure if i was going to have the money as i was working on it. but suddenly he started telling me hes busy at work lately and very busy at night and cant talk as much or at all anymore. not allowed on internet at work, etc. (are yall thinkin bullshit like i was?!?! good cuz if we know anything about him hes a partner at that job and i highly doubt anything was takin away from him) so i let it go. who am i to say bullshit right off the bat? right?! lol next thing i know im getting panick attacks alot. random hours of the day n night. for no reason. i wondered why but just thought maybe they were from the new stress of moving. Low and behold im asked to go vote for him (dont ask!) i put it off till this morning. when i go theres another girl there saying the same lines i used to say to him....’’i love you baby’...i got thinking hmmmmm lets put some things together shall we.... lol so i hastily put on my spy gear...leaving no expense unpaid. i went and spied n checked things out for myself. sure enough her little page says shes in love with him and hes her boyfriend and they are so happy together and blahblahfuckinblah lol shit that makes ya wanna gag i mean really lol yeah ok so maybe i thought the same mushy thoughts about him but i ALWAYS kept a dose of reality in my back pocket about this guy. I see hes a player. im not fuckin stupid lol you can only tell me so many bullshit stories and me not start steppin in them lol so i called him out on it. asked him straight up n dont lie to me are you seeing someone from where you live. FINALLY a fuckin honest answer!! he said yes. but he says it was unintentional as they met thro mutual friends and it just clicked. *coughsBULLSHITcoughs* he never meant to hurt me and he still loves me and hes so sorry.
ill admit i cried. for a few minutes. i shook like a leaf everytime another message would come with him telling me his version of the truth. ya wanna know what his real reason when it boils right down to it was?? he thought that i wouldnt get the money to be able to go to see him so he started dating this girl whom im willing to bet has a more profound effect in his life than hes leading on...im not sayin what in case the twat reads this lol oh btw neither you nor my man deserve me!
so in essence ladies....get that connection with the man your throwin i love yous at....then pay attention when your body starts telling you things are wrong. put on your spy gear and get to work!! chances are hes going to end up being a worthless cunt just like this one was lol bad at lying too.
but as an after thought i will say some nice things about this guy....he helped me see when i was at my lowest point that i am a beautiful person and sexy and i can have any man i want. i dont have to deal with the shit ive been dealing with and there is someone out there that will treat me good and love me for me. i had no self esteem and no self worth but thanks to this man and our long talks i realized that i am worth it. i deserve better and im going to take it by the horns! he helped me to see when i was too down on myself. and for that i am eternally greatful to this guy. thank you again for helping me to see. ill miss our long goofy talks but theres a reason why things didnt last. theres always a reason why people come into your life. but you dont realize it till they are gone. he gave me the confidence to move forward in my life. for the sake of my lil one and i. he gave me the confidence to put my foot down and say ive had enough and not be scared of the consquences.
to that guy...i say thank you again. I hope you have a nice life. This is the end of the road for us. I had alot of good times and have some very fond memories that i will take with me for a very long time. But she can have you!! lmao Been there rode that horse and put him away wet and drained thankyouveryfuckinmuch!!!! lmfao
 | hello! | Apr 7, '08 11:36 PM
for everyone |
i havent been here much as the dialup we had pissed me off way to much to try n get here most the time lol we have moved to a bigger place so kenna now has her own room and sleeping in a toddler bed! Now shes trying to teach herself to go potty on a chair. its been comical lol ill add a couple new pics of me. taken this past week. hope fully ill be on here more often! Ive missed you all greatly!
Brightest Blessings!
Huggggss n kissssssses
its not much.......its ungodly damn slow........but im here!!!
thank you so much for all the holiday wishes! you were all in my thoughts whie i was gone!!
I started a new job at the beginning of the month. yes I am now a proud walmart employee :-) actually i like my job alot. Kenna goes to the sitters during the week which she loves. Chris watches her on sundays.
I just started getting paid so its going to be a little longer before i can get out...but im trying...
I missed you all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
huggggggsssssssss
I am terribly sorry to everyone that I havent been online in 2 weeks. We havent had cable/internet all this time. Trust me, I am missing every single one of you and your terrific pages greatly!!!!
I want to wish you all a very merry christmas and the brightest of blessings in the new year!!!
Love always,
Kisssses n huggggsss
Erin
I wrote this to my group on msn this morning. As you will see...I wont be around very often for a little while. I dont know where my life is going to be headed now but damnit, he cant keep me stuffed in this moldy box any longer. I will take some repsonsibility for this as I should of stepped up alot sooner and said listen....WTF?!?!?!?! but I didnt and now its gotten so far that everything is going to get shut off and we are going to be thrown out very soon. I need to dig deep and find a way to do this. I know millions of women over millions of year have done this and I should be perfcetly fine but damnit IM SCARED. I am petrified of being on my own with my child now! Its one thing when its just yourself for a number of years.....but now I have my daughter to think about also. I need to find the strength that Angie, Kristi, Melissa and so many others of you have to leave the man that has done you wrong and set out to create a better life for you n your children by yourselves!!! PLEASE sed me the strength and courage to do this!!!
I love you all and I will try to be back to check in as much as I can. For the next few days its going to be touch n go as to when im here till i can get stuff packed up and actually get the help to leave him.
huggggsssss n kissssssssssses and much much love to you all!!
happy holidays from kenna and I to all of you!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(Letter to my group I posted this morning)
I am truly sorry about this....I wont be able to get on the puter for much longer so I wont be able to get on here very often till I can get internet where ever it is that I am going to be moving to. The problems that I wrote about and asked for prayers about a number of months ago has gotten worse. Everything that could possibly get a shut off notice has arrived. We are going to get evicted on top of that. My man has no concept of how to pay bills every week. He waits and waits till its too late then trys to put a bandaid over a skull fracture and then says that it will be alright for another month or so till they either shut it off or threaten to. Our cells are off, we just got 72 hour disconnect from electric co and final disconnect from cable.
I cant take anymore. I know being a witch that I should be able to help turn things around but I dont honestly see the point of it when he wont even help himself. I would have to keep doing it over and over and over again as he skirts thro life thinking this is the way to take care of his family. And since he cant take care of us and everything will be blamed on me...I am leaving him.
I know I should of listened a few months ago to get out but I had to keep faith and hope that things wil be different and him and I could work on our problems for our daughters sake. I tried. I tried.
I dont know how long before I am able to come back. Please please dont throw me from the group as this is the best thing that has happened to me in a long time and I so truly appreciate and love every one of you.
I will find a way to stop in as much as I can.
Thank you so much everyone!
Happy holidays to all of you!!!!
Brightest of Blessings to all of you throughout this holiday season and in the coming new year!!!
Much love and hugggssss
Dragonfly/Erin
 WHAT DOES A KISS TASTE LIKE? One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey's kiss in his mouth and asked, 'Do you know what it is?' 'No, I don't,' said the little boy. 'Okay,I'll give you a clue. It's the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work. 'Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled, 'Spit it out!!!! It's a piece of ass!'
Well, I showed the girl everything that was posted here...all the helpful and kind words and words of wisdom. She decided to end it right then and there. He wrote to her during all this and requested that they 'take a break from each other' for the week as 'his schedule would be crazy and wouldnt have time to chat' ....yeah another red flag!!! lol So she agreed to the week off. After reading this she decided that ya know what? hes just not worth it!! So she wrote to him again and very politely put it that she doesnt have time for him and needs to either work on her relationship with her man or leave him (thats a WHOLE other story!!) and with the holidays approaching she feels that she would just like to end it now and not take a week or reflection. He writes back the most laughable trash shes ever read...I'd like to include this now...copy n pasted right from her email..... ""I'm glad you finally came down to earth. I think the holidays hit home really hard for you. I learned a long time ago that the holidays is the best time to meet a woman, sadly I'm always too depressed this time of year to even try. Yeah it is one thing to talk about leaving your man and quite a different thing to actually do it. The reality of our situation is that you are 3 hours away and living with some guy and his daughter. I held back, never wanted to get too involved, that was the smart thing to do right? We both really needed somone to talk to and be sweet on, other than that... Wish you the best of luck, and would be happy to talk again when I'm in the mood to talk again. Have a great holiday.""
Yes....he pulled the manipulation of her emotions yet once again.
I am happy to report that after reading that a few times, getting a cup of coffee and reflecting on what exactly she wanted to say...and consulting a few people that had no idea of what was going on...she wrote back and told him off pretty much!!!!! She told him that those arent the reasons why she was ending it...she was trying to be nice for his poor fraile little ego but F%$K that....the gloves are OFF!!!!!! She told him the reasons why had ntohing to do with the holidays or her man and that the real reasons were all about him. She told him hes a lying manipulative jerk and wonders how long it will take before his wife finds out what a true bastard he is late at night sneakin around on the puter. She told him that he will no longer be able to manipulate her with his supposed bad days at work and his psycho ex g/f's and his lack of confidence with women...cuz hes been thro sooooo many so recently!!! She ends the note by telling himthat she never wants to see or hear from him again. Then she calmly deletes his name off her contact lists and puts them all on BLOCK.
She hasnt heard from him since and tells me that since doing that its like having a HUGE weight taken off her shoulders!!!
He is whats called a psychic vampire. They come in and feed off all your thoughts and emotions and leave you feeling empty, drained, and lifeless. You think its because they are this truly caring person that listens to you when in actualality they are just suckin the life force right out of you!!!!
I'm sure there are plenty of you out there that have encountered these types of people! Hell my mother is one! lol
Tell me about your encounters!!!
Happy 2nd Birthday MycKenna Skye!!!! Mommy and Daddy love you so very much! You are the apple in our eyes! The reason why we suddenly smile to ourselves in the middle of the day!!! We are so very blessed to have such a beautiful, smart, funny, outgoing, loving daughter as yourself!! May the following year be full of more wonderment,learning, dancing, laughing and fun that make your little eyes light up and sparkle!!! We love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!     
So the guy wants to settle down...tired of playing games. So the girl suggests possibly talking on the phone with each other. He says that would be fabulous! They set up day and time. He never calls. A couple days later on messenger he tells her that hes too afraid of getting his heart broke again and cant speak to her on the phone yet. (Also I should add that the guy only comes on and talks to her real late at night on yahoo.) He sends her jazz/blues songs via email. He has texted her a couple times but only to say that he cant keep texting cuz hes out of texting for the month. Thats AFTER a lengthy conversation via texting lol So the girl decides to send him a couple of pics of herself. He says thank you but he doesnt want to see pics cuz he wants to wait till the day they can be together and not to send anymore.
Are you just as perplexed about this man as I am now?!?! lol
I must tell you also that they met at an online "dating" site designed around "bootycalls".....and at first their conversations were flirty and get to know you a lil better before making that plunge to sexual...want to make sure not a serial killer or anything lol
After the not calling incident....he had also told her that the two of them meeting is just strictly for sex. nothing more. So the girl detaches herself from him emotionally. Draws back and doesnt share or talk to him as much as before. She's hurt.
Here it is a few months later and the guy still talks about how great life would be falling asleep with her in his arms and getting to stare at her beautiful eyes everyday would make him so very happy. Yes, he's changed his tune yet again.
Finally one day, the girl tells the guy that shes about had enough of his rediculousness about using the phone. She wants to hear his voice ...that doesnt mean they are getting married!!! He finally says yes to her...tomorrow he says....tomorrow comes and he does in fact call her. His voice isnt what she expected. Its not a deep deep manly voice, but it is manly. As they talk a few different times through out the day...she begins to realize that he bores the crap out of her lol He's intellictual like she wants...hes funny, smart, charming, romantic, caring, full of ideas.....but he's actually rather boring. With that being said, she starts to become distant again to him. She lets it slip one night that she talks to other guys online and on the phone. They are friends, (but theres one guy....2 we will call him....who makes her giddy in more places than just her mind!! He has a deep sexy voice that ooozes a thick southern drawl... Sometimes its so thick that when he goes to talk to other people while on the phone with her...it sounds just like hes Boomhower from King of the Hill lol But ohhhhh that voice...makes her melt...her heart races....her fingers tremble....*sighs*)
The guy can't stand the fact that shes talking to other guys. She tells him they are all friends and they make her laugh. He tells her that he has lost all respect for her cuz it seems like she is looking for sex where ever she can find it. (?!?!?!) She says WTF? Who said anything about sex? They have a big fight. Going to end the whole thing. Just walk away. She prepared herself for this moment with him cuz as I've said before...she knows something isnt right about this guy. He tells her he cant believe she wants to end it...he was hoping she would fight for him. She tells him he has no right to be pissed at her for anything....
They talked it out, they decide to go back to being friends. Then just as shes getting offline, he drops the bomb of...I dont want you talking to other men if your going to be with me.
She's confused. She's ready to tell him to take a flying leap. She's had enough. Who needs drama like that?!?!?!
OH speaking of drama....a couple of weeks earlier of all this taking place....the guy tells her that he still talks to a girl that he once dated briefly. She's messed up he says. She lost both her brothers and a parent in one months time. She's always putting him down but yet hes scared shes going to kill herself....will the girl please email her and talk to her. He's so scared. He lays on this guilt trip. The girl tells him she doesnt have a good feeling about it and doesnt want to get involved. He says but your such a good listener and you give great advice. You will know just what to say to keep this other girl from killing herself. She tells him no that she cant get involved. Shes not trying to sound heartless but it sounds like more of a hassle that she wants to let into her life. She has images of the girl stalkin her because she talks to this guy and everything else!! The guy keeps insisting. The girl tells him no and logs off yahoo.
The next day theres an email from him with the other girls last message to him included. She calls him stupid and a lowlife, scum and a dirtbag. She wonders why the hell he wants her to talk to such a person. Then she logs on yahoo and theres a bunch of offlines from the guy telling her that if she doesnt help this girl and try to talk to her that when she kills herself its all going to be her fault and on her conscience cuz she didnt try to help her. etc etc
She tells him that if he ever threatens her like that again then their friendship is thro. he apologizes.
Now I ask you....should she continue to talk to this guy?
Who else thinks hes hiding the fact that hes married or something???
ALSO one more crucial piece of information.... She lives with her boyfriend who is her childrens father. lol Wants to leave him....thats all i can say about it for now.
I think I covered all the crucial info....i hope lol
I look forward to your replys!! There will also be more installments of this as things either progress or regress between the girl and guy.
Isnt it funny how things turn out sometimes....
a friend of mine went to a few different 'dating' sites.....met a few guys...got talking to a couple of them. One lives about 2 hours from her and was sweet talking the hell out of her! tellingher how she was being mistreated and if she was his girl then she would be romanced and treated with the upmost respect. Taken well care of and loved to the extreme. He would also love and take care of her children too. Sound too good to be true? thats cuz it is. It became more and more apparent to the girl that the guy was hiding something from her. He says he was going thro too many relationships that didnt work out...he was meeting wild n crazy women and just wanted someone sane and safe to settle down with. and wanted to settle down as soon as possible.
(have to finish this another time...sorry!!!)
I knew I was sitting in front of the puter too much....but thought that by doing short spurts of projects here n there that i was keeping busy. Sheeeeesh was I delusional!!!! lol We've had problems with our cable since last sunday night...it finally got turned back on n working right this past fri afternoon....omg the shit I got done this past week! lol We changed around the livingroom....that right there is a major cleaning task as nothing had really been moved since we moved in almost 3 years ago.....especially the ent center as its too heavy for me to move myself and chris is only helpful when he feels like it lol (like most men! *ducks* lmao)
After we got that moved around and cleaned....my desk took a major blow as it was too big to fit into the space that we now had made for it...so he ripped the top off of it and took a circular saw to it and shaved off the sides and back!!!! lol
Then my next task was to move the bedroom around again....well Kenna's crib, dresser n changing table(which is now just a catchall cuz havent been able to change her on it since she was about 6 months old lol) all stayed in the same place....we move the bed under the window where the electric heater is in the summer to put the ac in the other window....then it gets moved back to the other window once the ac is removed in the winter so we can use the electric heater.....so I have to move around dressers, side tables, night stands, etc every freakin time i move stuff around.
I actually had started to try n clean out the crap in the closet/storage room but got busy with errands outside the house on fri and then low-n-behold the cable was back on when i got home that afternoon lolol so I havent done a damn thing in there again lol
There are about 5 diaper boxes in my kitchen that have all the papers, books, odds n ends that were in my desk that I need to go thro....trying to figure out if we still need them and wtf to do with them once i determine they are keepable lol
ahhhhhh but will i do it today??? oh HELL no!!!! I'm packin Kenna up to go to my sisters to go see the new baby pretty soon lol Deven is such a cutie! I cant wait till hes big enough to start playing with kenna!
OH! I started a new baking thing lately too....prolly wont last long...some of these things never do....my mom gave me a rolling pin....thats cool. I just found a recipe for sugar cookie frosting....now have to wait till we get the extra money for me to make these with kenna.
OH! Her 2nd birthday is coming up VERY soon. Its the 23rd. We are having a Dora the Explorer party for her at the inlaws on thanksgiving and I'm trying to get some of my family together on fri or sat afternoon for a little bit so they can participate this year also. WE DO NOT mix the families together.....I dont see it as a good thing. Altho they have gotten along very well in the past together.....I just dont think its something that should become a habit lol
ANYWAYS!!!!!
Hope everyone has a great week!!
Here's the pics of the desk before it was ripped apart....lolol
| themes | Nov 4, '07 3:42 PM
for everyone |
OMG there are so many great themes to find on this one groups site I joined...I've gotten thro 105 pages of themes and changed them about 10 times on my page lol BUT when I first joined multiply I saw this purple theme and absolutely loved it but didnt know how to grab it. Well I finally found it! I hope ya like it as much as I do!
I'm starting to get more used to this site which is very cool :-) I logged into my 360 page and notice that its been about 2 weeks since anyone has left a message or comment. lol I'm happy that alot of my friends are starting to come to multiply and I'm meeting alot of new friends from the groups I have joined!
Soon I'll start blogging more here....now since i KNOW my nosey inlaws arent familiar with the site lol
until then.....
Have a great week everyone!!
Brightest Blessings!
hugggggggssss
9 Things I Hate About Everyone
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.
3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!
5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.
6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
8 When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?
9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?
Looking for an easy sewing pattern for a sewing machine cover. I realize all machines are different sizes but I can customize it to fit my machine no problem. I just need an easy pattern that i can print or download..
All suggestions on where to find one or if you even have one that you can email me I would sooooooo be appreciative!!
Thank you so much and I hope everyone has a great thursday!!!!
hugggggsssss
Here are the new pics of Deven, my new great nephew....first one is his mommy, my niece Kindall holding him and the second is his daddy, her hubby Bill holding him. I cant wait till he comes home and i get to cuddle him! He's so adorable!!
Today, 10/18/2007, my neice Kindall just gave birth to her first son via c section. He weighed 9lbs 7ozs....6ozs bigger then my Kenna!! His name is Deven but not sure of last name. MY sister just called and siad he has dirty blonde almost light brown hair and its about an inch long. 
If MycKenna and I go up to see her tonite or tomorrow I'll be sure to snap a couple pictures of the lil guy and post them!
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